Dedicated to my father I can feel it beating. Deep in my chest. Something small, but heavy. I don’t even know what it is. A sharp, pinning ache. Has it been here since June 23? How am I supposed to carry this alone? Can I even heal alone? So I try to remember your face. It’s hard. But somehow, the weight feels lighter. I run, wild, to the sea under a sky with no moon. Memories crash over me, all at once. I ask myself why? No one knows why my heart swells and breaks like this. All I know is I’m just trying to survive. Life isn’t what it seems. Sometimes, I find answers in dreams. Like a voice, whispering old secrets meant only for me. So I cry at night for something I never knew was inside me. In the dark, a lone star guides me home. I tell myself, I’ll see you again. If I call your name loud enough. I’m not alone. So I try again, to remember your face. This place. It’s hard. But the weight feels lighter. I remember.
by Ma. Graciella